Indie Rock: Soda Drinker Pro

I didn’t know that I wanted a game that simulates what it’s like to drink Soda until now. I’d have previously thought: “If I wanted to drink Soda I’d just drink Soda, any other option is absolutely stupid and pointless and should never be suggested” then step on over to my nearest purveyor of carbonated beverages. This could be a bar, a restaurant, a supermarket or a family owned business. There were a variety of options available to anyone with a serious thirst that can only be quenched by the refreshing taste of an Ice-Cold Soda. It isn’t exactly in short supply.

My life took a drastic change recently when I decided to cut out unnecessary sweets from my eating habits. Let’s not go into the specifics, this is about Soda now and there’s no reason for us to get bogged down in my life and the unwanted weight I’m gaining. Soda’s a large source of excess sugar and even the “Diet” branded options have been linked with a variety of health issues. There was seemingly just no good option if you want to drink Soda and still remain healthy.

Until now.

Soda Drinker Pro is a way for humans of all ages to drink Soda without any of the calories, nor actually having to drink a Soda at all. Built in Unity, Soda Drinker Pro gives you 5 locations to explore from a first person perspective and drink a delicious Soda within. You’ve full control in real-time of your forward, backward and sideways movement in three dimensions as well as your ability to bring a cup of Soda (complete with straw) to your mouth. There is nothing getting in your way between wanting to feel what it’s like to drink a Soda and then simulating the activity of drinking a Soda. You boot up Soda Drinker Pro and there you have it, 24/7, no leaving the house, no deliveries necessary.

In some ways Soda Drinker Pro offers a simulation that’s actually better than the real thing as it lets you drink Soda in locations that might not be readily available to you or even anyone you know that you could listen to. You can drink a Soda on the beach, in a weird room or even in space. Only very specific career paths allow you the chance to drink Soda in space so this game grants everyone that unique experience. It levels the playing field for people in all walks of life.

Soda Drinker Pro’s realism extends to you needing to ensure you’ve got the Soda held up to your mouth in order for it to be drunk. If you try to drink it and it’s not in your mouth then nothing happens and your Soda Meter isn’t draining. Once that Soda is complete you can move to the next location, but even then you can choose to pick up Bonus Soda if you’re interested (you are, there is no way to not be).

The simulation also offers the auditory experience of the Soda being drunk by adding the traditional sucking noises that are commonplace in any Soda drinking. There’s even no branding on the Soda so if you’re interested in only one type and can’t stand anything else, Soda Drinker Pro provides a way for you to simulate the style of Soda you want without an unwanted distraction. The Soda you’re drinking can be any Soda you want, you aren’t being judged in any way.

It’s too early to be even thinking about game of the year contenders, but as Soda Drinker Pro is a rare instance of a game that is literally changing lives for the better every day, I’m suggesting that we give it the recognition and accolades it deserves now; long before awards season even begins.

Thank you Soda Drinker Pro. Thank you for everything you’ve done for us.

Oh, Also

There is no point doing an extra recommendation this week. Soda Drinker Pro is the only important release right now. Every other game is, understandably, less meaningful and nowhere near comparatively worth your time.

Play Soda Drinker Pro. Do Not Stop Playing Soda Drinker Pro. You Love Soda Drinker Pro. It Is The Only Three Dimensional Real Time Video Game Simulation Of Soda Drinking.

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